disconnect to reconnect
become more present and restore your attention span
You have a screen problem.
I did.
I do.
It’s a constant battle.
Your phone is always trying to pull you away from what’s right in front of you.
You probably spend more time looking down than up.
~posture check~
Unfortunately, life doesn’t happen in your phone, it happens in front of you.
Time to raise your head.
Time to engage with the world.
Time to give people your full attention.
Time to give the hobbies you love your full focus.
Nothing worse than missing something because you were sending a snapchat.
Nothing worse than trying to talk to someone who is on their phone.
Nothing worse than being too distracted to relax.
This whole “restore your attention span” thing is hard. In fact, it’s probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
It takes immeasurable discipline.
My brain is giga fried into oblivion.
I can’t watch TV without going on my phone.
Make it through an entire movie? Yeah right.
Hangout with friends, device free? Lol.
I’m on my phone at the gym, at work, in the shower, and at the beach.
I’m on my phone in bed, on the toilet, in my car, and out with friends.
I am always plugged in, and if you’re reading this, I’d bet you are too.
This whole journey started for me roughly a year and a half ago when I realized I couldn’t sit down and get through a movie.
I couldn’t play video games without a twitch stream on the side.
I couldn’t spend time with my friends and not check socials.
I couldn’t watch anime without pausing half-way to see if I got any texts.
I used to love reading—not possible anymore.
I was checking my phone in the middle of workouts.
I was doom-scrolling TikTok while I was at the beach.
It’s almost laughable when you think about it.
It’s time to be present in the moments that matter.
It’s time to enjoy the things you love again.
It’s time to restore your attention span.
Before I share the ancient scrolls of wisdom with you, let me get off my high-horse.
I am so far from perfect — and frankly, I’m not trying to be. As much as a device free life would be cool, it’s just not the meta. It’s the way of the world. Going device free, social media free, tech free, can be cool for a time, but there are absolutely positives to having all these awesome features. No need to nerf yourself unnecessarily.
Your phone grants you instant access to any information you desire.
Your phone lets you connect with anyone almost instantly.
Your phone simplifies tasks and saves you time.
The list goes on and on.
As my favorite college professor drilled into my head:
❝
“With great power, comes great responsibility.”
Uncle Ben, Spiderman
How do we merge the two?
What’s the right balance? How do we leverage our device to make life better, without deterring us from what’s important?
The big problem (in my opinion) is that half the time we check our devices without meaning too. By impulse. By habit.
We lack agency.
The solution I’ve landed on?
Intentionality.
You should be checking your device — using your device — intentionally.
It means using our devices when we intend to… not by accident on the 10 second elevator ride.
I hope that makes sense.
Okay, here are a few strategies that have helped me with focus and presence:
Use timers
Delete apps
Do Not Disturb
Log out of apps
Single-task only
Read & listen to podcasts
Keep apps on another device
Leave phone in another room
Many of these are self-explanatory, yet overlooked and extremely powerful.
Use Timers:
Timers are one of the best focus tools I’ve ever used. They create a clear boundary between work and play.
Set a timer for deep work. Set a timer for scrolling TikTok. Simple.
If you struggle to focus, try the Pomodoro Method—25 minutes of work, 5 minutes of rest. It boosts productivity, prevents burnout, and keeps your mind sharp.
For me, it’s the perfect balance. I get things done without frying my brain. Walk on your breaks, scroll if you want—just be intentional.
Delete Apps:
Quitting apps completely can help you break free from the constant pull of distractions, allowing you to refocus and regain control over your time and energy.
I tried deleting them myself, but redownloading and logging in each time was just too much friction.
For some though, cold turkey is the best move.
My takeaway: A break from social media showed me how little I need it.
Could be worth a shot.
Do Not Disturb (Also Airplane Mode):
This is one of my go-to’s, paired with a timer.
When I turn on Do Not Disturb, my brain instantly shifts into focus mode. Creating even small barriers teaches the mind that it’s okay to miss things—once the decision is made, for some reason the body listens.
It’s also not a huge deal when I get a little reward at the end of my 25 minute block.
This has also been useful for me in calming myself down when I feel overwhelmed with a group message, or don’t want to feel the urge to check my phone while driving.
Log Out Of Apps:
This is the strategy that has worked best for me regarding social media. Not a huge barrier, but just enough to keep me from not checking apps impulsively.
I set a long password, and log out each time.
Now I check social media on my terms, which again, is what I think is most important.
Single-Task Only:
Stop multi tasking.
You have too many side quests open. You are forgetting about the main story.
Multitasking consistently stimulates your brain. This overstimulation messes with your dopamine system, making you crave more and more distraction.
Over time, your ability to focus weakens. Even short videos start feeling too long. Silence and stillness become uncomfortable.
If you struggle to focus, it’s not a personal failure. Your brain has been trained for distraction. The only way out is to stop feeding the cycle.
Good luck with this one.
Read & Listen To Podcasts:
Alright, this is where the magic happens. This is what actually stretches your attention span back out.
Reading is hard.
You don’t have patience.
You can’t follow a long form idea.
Social media has zap spelled your little brain.
Social media serves you what you want right away. That’s cool but guess what? It’s shallow. Not meaningful. No lasting impact.
Following an authors thinking over the course of 300 pages, or a podcasters thoughts over the course of 3 hours is challenging. It takes effort and consistency. The dopamine is delayed. Your brain hates it.
It’s boorrrrrrinnnnnggg.
It’s not. It’s awesome. You just lack the ability to make it happen.
Reading and podcasting are how you cement a concrete idea in your head. It’s how you actually learn.
It’s how you grow as a person. It’s how you grow your attention span.
Keep Apps On Another Device:
For a long time, I kept social media only on my computer. This was nice because I could still use social media, but wasn’t really able to check it out in the world.
I think this is fantastic, but again also not completely practical. There are moments where it’s nice to be on the apps.
A cool barrier you can deploy, but maybe a bit big for some. I have a friend who finds this tactic incredibly valuable.
Leave Phone In Another Room:
This is what I did when I was 10, and still do from time to time. For some reason, the brain just understands that it’s time to work.
I still utilize this in social settings or for workouts. It’s incredibly powerful. If I’m getting dinner with family, I’ll often leave my phone in the car.
This is an active decision to engage in the activity you are about to partake in.
This is how you become more present.
I bet you’ll enjoy yourself more too.
Anyway, I know this is a long read, but I hope you can find some value in it.
Remember the key is intention.
In my opinion, the future is reserved for the people who can control themselves. The people who can rise above all this digital slop and leverage their little super computer for something greater than cheap dopamine.
I don’t know how you feel, but I was tired of being a slave to my phone. In my eyes, I was pathetic and needed to change.
Taking back control is unbelievably challenging, but I promise you won’t regret trying.
Thanks for reading.
-Dante